Tuesday, February 25, 2014
How much is that doggie in the window?
Sometimes things happen in life that are just too funny to ignore and this, my friends, is just one such story. My 21 year old daughter, Nina, lives in a rental townhouse in her college town with 3 other girls. For the most part they get along despite their differing natures. Nina is especially close to one of the girls (we shall call her Lisa), and they have developed a relationship much akin to that of Lucy and Ethel; though, when I suggested that particular pairing to Nina she insisted that they were “way more like Snooki and Jwoww”. Anyway, Lisa and her beau decided to purchase a puppy for their Valentine’s Day gift to each other. Now, mind you, neither of them lives in pet friendly housing nor do they have the time or financing necessary to raise a puppy. But purchase the puppy, they did, and I must admit that she is absolutely darling. (We shall call her Lulu) Unfortunately, all of the puppy cuteness in the world does not exclude the fact that Lulu is now a fugitive from the apartment management company and must be carried in and out concealed beneath the outerwear of her “parents” and “Auntie Nina”. Get the picture? And, of course, this is exactly the life that I predicted for this little darling. But, just when you think there is no more to the story, there always seems to be a little surprise. In this case, it is the advent of online service dog registration. Apparently, “Snooki and Jwoww” decided that they could beat this horrid lease clause by going online to one of the various “certification” sites, register Lulu as a bonafide service dog, and no one would ever be able to remove her from their house. Truly, I think they might be on to something! There were, however, a couple of issues that had to be tackled first. For example, the registration fee for Lulu was $70. As you can imagine, both of these young women are college students and the fact that they even have a place to live is because of the generosity of their parents. They complain consistently about starvation, unibrows, and the cost of beer at the local distributor; all as a result of their lack of disposable funding. But in this case, coming up with $70 was, somehow, as easy as finding the cash to purchase yet more Candy Crush credits. Just like that, $70 later, Lulu is official. The next issue, however, is Lulu’s purpose. Neither of the girls are blind, therefore, Lulu is not a Seeing Eye dog. Nor are either of them physically disabled, so Lulu doesn’t need to provide assistance in that manner. But wonder of wonders, Auntie Nina has a documented disability resulting from her horrible high school years – ANXIETY! So little Lulu is the answer to all of her problems. All they need to do is explain to the property manager that she is there to provide comfort and support for Nina’s anxiety issues. Really???? Nina’s father and I are the loving caretakers of two adult dogs who were also adopted as the result of Nina’s need for comfort and support. Does either of them live with her? Nope, they live with us and because of that fact, Daddy and I are in need of emotional support. What about that, “Snooki”? I wish nothing but happiness for little Lulu and, for the girls, a life unencumbered by the realities of lease clauses! Peace Out!!