Monday, April 11, 2011

Couldn't help but roll this one out again; it's a particular favorite of mine; and, timeless, as well. It was originally written in 2008 and you will notice that nothing has changed! Enjoy.

The topic for today....(drumroll, please!)....SEX!! That's right, you heard it correctly; I'm going to talk about sex, today. It is in the front of my brain these days as my amazing Pastor has been conducting a series of sermons over the last few weeks, fondly referred to as The Summer Sizzler. Now, to be fair, the entire series has not been about sex, per se; but, rather about relationships and more specifically healthy marriages. Recreational sex, it seems, plays a huge part in creating and maintaining a healthy marriage. Yeah, right!! I'll tell you what creates and maintains a healthy marriage - Estrogen! Now, to be fair, I am not expecting men to understand this particular concept; you are driven by testosterone. Women, on the other hand, are powered by a very fickle hormone known as estrogen. It is what makes us women; it is what makes us your biological mate. But it also makes us your ideological opposite. Your testosterone, though it does decrease with age, lessens so slowly that its absence is almost unnoticeable. But for those of us who are driven by constantly fluctuating levels of estrogen, the desire for recreational sex fluctuates, as well. It goes something like this:

A 20-Something woman - Oh, yeah! (I have no kids, I look great and my estrogen level is at flood stage)

A 30-Something woman - Maybe this weekend if I'm not exhausted! (Are you kidding? I have 2 kids, a job, a house, and my estrogen level ebbs and flows with the stages of the moon)

A 40-Something woman - Maybe when we're on vacation this summer and I can like you a little bit! (Ok, now you're really funny! The kids have huge issues, our larger house is impossible to keep clean, plus, I need to be married to my job to help pay for it; and, my estrogen is disappearing faster than your leg hair)

A 50-Something woman - Maybe next New Year's Eve when I'm totally tipsy! (Keep dreaming! The kids may be gone but so is my estrogen; and, I have more hair on my chin then you now have on your head)

A 60-Something woman - Maybe when Hell freezes over! (I've spent 40 years listening to you whine about recreational sex and I've had enough; that ship has sailed)

None of this means that we don't love you, gentlemen! And, it doesn't mean that we can't have healthy marriages. But it's time for you and the scientists of the world to take our libido seriously and develop a little blue pill for us, too. Until then, grow up and deal with it!!

Peace Out!!

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